News

Unreal News Challenge 2007

Continued from page 3

42) What has been proposed as the new name for the stretch of Interstate 70 currently designated as the Mark McGwire Highway?
A) The T.S. Eliot Memorial Wasteland Highway.
B) The John F. Bass Memorial Highway.
C) The Mark Twain Memorial Highway.
D) The Ike Turner Memorial Speedway.

43) Under what circumstances did St. Louis Mayor Francis Slay say he'd sign a proclamation creating "Ike Turner Day"?
A) If Turner were to pay a visit to hype the St. Louis Family Justice Center.
B) If Turner were to go three rounds with local kickboxer/hottie Jamie O'Hare.
C) If Turner were to agree to play at next year's Strassenfest.
D) If Hell freezes over.

44) What ailment affected more than 60 daycare centers in the St. Louis region?
A) Shigellosis.
B) Scurvy.
C) Bubonic plague.
D) Clytemnestra.

45) Who is Jono Sanders, and why was his butt sore?
A) He is the owner of the Web site www.milliondollarsoutofmybutt.com which he dreamed up to pay off his student loans.
B) He's a former client of St. Louis Skin Solutions who alleges that instead of receiving the gluteal-augmentation surgery he went in for, he was outfitted with silicone breast implants.
C) He's the drunk Washington University concertgoer who was Tasered in the ass by campus police.
D) Shigellosis.

46) What did Saint Louis Symphony Orchestra conductor David Robertson and his pianist wife Orli Shaham name their new twin sons?
A) Liam and Ewan.
B) Abbott and Costello.
C) Alex and Nathan.
D) Castor and Pollux.

47) June 10 was a day of mourning for many in St. Louis. How so?
A) It was the day construction crews took down the Tamm Avenue Bridge over Highway 40.
B) It was the day officials at the Missouri Botanical Garden announced that a 225-year-old giant sequoia had succumbed to bark beetles.
C) It was the day the Mary Engelbreit store at the Saint Louis Galleria — the chain's last brick-and-mortar store — closed for good.
D) It was the day Mayor Francis Slay shot down Ike Turner Day.

48) How much in damages did a St. Louis County jury award Metro in its lawsuit against the Cross-County Collaborative?
A) $80 million.
B) The head of Kwame Building Group president and CEO Tony Thompson.
C) Nothing. In fact, jurors awarded the Cross-County Collaborative $2.56 million in damages.
D) Nothing. They kissed and made up. In fact, the families of former Metro chief Larry Salci and Tony Thompson are at this moment spending Christmas together in Aruba.

49) To which cause has 1977 Cleveland High School graduate Bruce Santhuff devoted his life?
A) As a Jesuit missionary in Africa, Santhuff has devoted his life to eradicating polio.
B) As a childhood fan of the Spirits of St. Louis, Santhuff works tirelessly to bring professional basketball back to St. Louis.
C) As the sole importer of the Spaloo, a toilet seat that doubles as a bidet, Santhuff has devoted himself to the hygiene of all Americans.
D) As the loser of a contested election in 1976 for class president, Santhuff has devoted his life to getting administrators at Cleveland High School to conduct a full and impartial recount.

50) What incident marred last year's Mothers Against Drunk Driving convention in St. Louis?
A) Sixty-seven attendees fell ill with a mysterious virus.
B) Sixty-seven attendees were unable to summon cabs to take them back to their hotel.
C) Keynote speaker Tony La Russa backed out.
D) All of the above.

Match the St. Louis Cardinal with his vice:
51) Tony La Russa. A,B,C
52) Scott Spiezio. A,B,C
53) Josh Hancock. A,B,C
A) Drinking.
B) Drinking.
C) Drinking.

54) In May, Washington University researcher Dr. Herbert "Skip" Virgin reported that he'd discovered a way to enhance the immune system, enabling it to better ward off maladies such as food poisoning. What does he prescribe?
A) Maintain a healthy diet and get plenty of sleep.
B) Resist the temptation to hold your sorority sister's hair as she vomits that six-pack of Zima.
C) Eat dirt.
D) Expose yourself to a strain of the herpes virus.

55) To what does St. Louisan Gary Long attribute his massive weight loss?
A) The Grapefruit 45 Diet.
B) Diet Dr Pepper.
C) Walking across the United States.
D) Oprah.

56) What was the topic of the educational film Orchard Farm High School teacher Tiffany Kalabus' class thought they'd be watching when they were instead treated to a clip from a pornographic movie?
A) The mating habits of orangutans.
B) The mosaics of Ravenna, Italy.
C) Volcanoes.
D) The Special Olympics.

57) When Riverview Gardens school leaders attended an education conference in Orlando, what items from the trip were not billed to the district?
A) Two $50 pedicures.
B) A $416 restaurant tab.
C) More than $28,000 for the entire six-day event.
D) "My School Board Went to Florida and All I Got Was a Crummy T-Shirt" T-shirts for the entire Riverview Gardens School District student body.

58) Who is Sylvia Brickman Slone?
A) Executive director of the Missouri Veterans Commission.
B) St. Louis County Circuit Court clerk.
C) The St. Louis city official who spearheaded the drive to cancel Mighty Mud Mania 2007.
D) Miss Nursing Home 2007.

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